Sure, you dread Mondays more than the dentist, and yes you need three cups of coffee before you can even allow your colleagues to so much as look at you, but that’s normal, right?
Well, what if I told you Mondays aren’t the problem and Brenda from accounts isn’t either.
The undeniable fact is that you hate your job and probably need a new one.
See how many of the following “I hate my job” symptoms are true to you:
1. You need more than five hits of the snooze button every morning before you even consider getting up.
From the moment you open your eyes, you are already counting down the 14 hours until you’ll be back in your bed again.
By the time you actually emerge from under your duvet, you’re 30 minutes behind schedule and you have already decided you’re not wearing makeup or doing your hair today.
On the plus side, your boss is so used to you being late every morning, and you’re pretty sure he thinks your working hours are 9:45 to 5:30 now.
2. Your only work friendship is built on your mutual hatred of everyone else there.
You spend the majority of the working day sending ranting texts to each other from five feet apart.
“FML,” “Lord give me strength” and “I don’t get paid enough for this sh*t,” are the basis of all your text conversations.
3. You frequently fantasize about retirement. You’re 26.
You have also started playing the lottery and looking to marry up.
Since keeping your job is the new pay raise, you have to think outside the box when it comes to raising funds.
4. During the workday, you check Facebook more often than you check your work email.
In fact, your office hours spent web surfing is getting out of hand.
When asked to do something, you may look up from your online shopping basket and say, “Can you drop me an email about it please?”
But, what you really mean is, “I’m going to need another three coffees before I’m fully functional.
Send me an email and if I can be bothered, I’ll do it later.”
5. You spend a fair number of your working hours looking for a new job.
When your boss asks you to do something, you reply with, “I’m just in the middle of an important email, I’ll be with you in 10.”
You then casually continue your application process.
6. Your weekends have become the most precious thing in the world to you.
More precious than your family, more precious than your friends and more precious than those shoes you spent half of last month’s pay on.
You constantly congratulate yourself on getting through another month of work.
7. You’re no longer tactful when disagreeing with your boss.
Most of your exchanges hold a sarcastic undertone. Sometimes you remember to smile so he or she can think you’re joking, sometimes you don’t.
You find his or her feelings about you to be somewhat inconsequential anyway.
After all, what’s the worse he could do? Fire you? You should be so lucky.
8. Coffee and wine form the basis of your pre and post-work diet.
Coffee to help you face the day and wine to help you forget it.
9. You avoid after-work office happy hours like the plague.
Especially since your entire relationship with every single member of staff is based on you being too sober to tell them what you actually think of them.
Plus, you already spend eight unwanted hours of the day with these morons; not even alcohol can persuade you to prolong that.
You’d much rather go home, make a cup of tea and seek comfort in the fact another day is over.
But here’s the thing: The average person spends about half of his or her waking life at work.
So, by this logic, if you hate your job, you hate your life.
If you’re unhappy, perhaps it’s time to find a new job that better suits your interests and skills.
Or, if you can’t manage that, at the very least find one that pays well enough that you couldn’t hate it even if you tried.